My 13-year-old daughter walked into the room when I was trying this on.

“Mom,” she said. “You know I love you more than anything in the world. But you cannot wear that out of the house. Like ever.”

Unlike some of the past #FashionFails featured here, I actually have worn this out of the house. (Don’t tell my daughter. She still thinks I might be a tiny bit cool.) Even though it is two sizes too big and was the day I bought it (Me: “It’s meant to sit low like this and pool around the sides, I think.”) and looks more like a festive holiday table runner than a skirt.

I keep trying to segue into the part of the story where Kathy Ireland was shopping in the same store when I bought this and I got a picture with her and everything, but I realize that part is totally irrelevant and also is not a sufficient reason to continue to hoard this tulle atrocity.

I don’t know about you guys, but I really feel like I’m growing as a person over here. Also I still haven’t found the Cher jeans, which is starting to feel worrisome.

Stay tuned.